Long Beach Acorn

Where are you now?

I just found an acorn from MS, I am holding it in the palm of my hand.

My childhood and I want to remember the day I found it with you, but, I can’t find you in the image of this acorn though it came from a place we both knew. In fact, as I see the discovery: a brick wall beside me, dark acorns the size of fat dimes laying around my sandal-feet, little hats for them clinging in couples on the outer rim of the pile, the hats look like they’re waiting for the baby nuts to roll back into them again.

Suddenly, I recall that you were not there. You, soul mate, were in my heart and alive within my soul as I smiled down at the acorns and I went down to pick one up along with a pair of possible hats. In my hand that sunny day, the tiny wonders gripped my feeling and called out with me: your name. Though neither of us saw you, and we surely haven’t heard you in a while, the acorn and I cut a door into my heart where we can find you any time.

I’ll love you forever, and, every time I walk that street, I’ll be with you no matter how far away you try to be.

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Our Song

The sound of Transatlanticism brings you back to me.

That steady ticking and the slow, heavy piano

is the spirit of what we felt while we were tied–

together in every room for twenty years.

 

I need you in this one–

like a toddler needs his teddy.

Come back this way, ok?

Row through the door into my room today.

Looking Hip and Nature-y

In a line along the rock-face of the Cumberland River, there’s a row of bushes that’s familiar to me now. Their prime is July, their purpose is to tickle and tempt victims to trip as they search for beautiful routes outside the merciless sunlight. Somewhere behind a tall patch of trees, a slab wall stands calling out names as people pass. One of the routes called to me and I was caught in its rustic, colorful hands. With the help of a swimmer, a sailor, and a model-airplane builder, I made it to the top in graceful, liberating joy. That was just after the climb was ascended by a delightfully happy gamer-boy.

Until next time, King’s Bluff. I know you won’t forget us, a quirky crew of young adult Crag-ers laughing and carrying on into the 4th of July.

Glob-Go-Doddy

I remember the shape of your watch

A dark square against the elegant skin which lay

smooth over muscles and bones.

The dark black square danced gracefully in my peripheral

as you sat across from me

eating a burger and talking with your hands.

“I’m very good at meeting dads,” you said behind an infinite grin.

 

Games are played in every moment we exchange;

What could this be to win?

Was it a cry of your pride against the whelming tide

of my admiring men?

Or did you mean it from the heart

a spontaneous, unanalyzed thought?

Either you like me and you want the crown

Or you vehemently do not.

 

I remember the shape of your shoes beside mine

as we sat on the steps of the church that night.

You had your treats: Sunday’s secret plans

And I had mine:

To hold my breath in hours with friends

Until boring conversations found their ends.

I’d fill each quiet moment analyzing the signs

Of just what might be going on

Inside your private mind.

06.12.18

I rush after these memories because

my moments with you are a tree-lined dirt path down which I can flee

from reality.

Yes,

You are an escape for my soul.

An unpredictable story and organic motion

I like to watch you move and create with expert precision.

An inspirational sight

As pink-blue and warm-cool as sunset

Surrounding white clouds in a summer sky.

You are an aged key to a secret garden

I rub it slowly between my finger and thumb and think of it all the time.

You are my thoughts crammed into the seconds between when they call my name and when the children cry.

You are my favorite book and I’m in the middle of it.

You are a bright light on the gems of my mind.

The Sound of Ascent

A crowd may gather to

Cheer for me,

A fan may show his interest by persistent

Teasing.

Duels and jabs are the eager man’s game

But you

Gracefully

Pour victory out to me.

 

By the sound of your voice

Warm beneath me, “Now just reach up for it. However feels comfortable…”

Cool against my fear, you are

Steadily speaking, “Take a deep breath” when I

Tremble and am tempted to let go.

I hold on when you are near.

 

You have faith in me;

You offer to catch me and you tell me,

“It’s all you” when I know that isn’t true.

The voice is yours

The hands are yours

The smile is yours

The lighthearted mood was your idea.

I merely get to join in and play along to the song

Of your heart for the rock wall.

 

Far too long I waited and I climbed alone

Never again will I ascend without

Your voice to keep me calm.